Archangel Consolidated

The Sons of Metatron

by Joel Fernandez

Celestial creation can be a very tricky process. It is essentially a roll of the dice to see how a particular creation will turn out. To that end, two out of the first three of god the father’s creations became the “devil”. Divine beings are different from humanity in many ways, but there are some similarities as well. They can become jealous, hateful, resentful and so on and so forth. The key difference is that human beings are capable of changing to a much greater extent than divine beings. Today’s conversation will be about the sons of Metatron and some of the ups and downs that they have experienced up until this point because of their disparate personalities.

The first of Metatron’s sons was named Ajax by god the father himself. He was designed to be a copy of Metatron in appearance as well as style. Metatron’s second son was named Azrael, also by god the father. He was designed to be an honest version of Metatron’s twin brother Sandalphon. He decided to name his third son Gabriel after his former “best friend” the archangel Gabriel (from the bible). The circumstances that led to the creation of Metatron’s fourth son were considered extraordinary at the time, thus he was given extraordinary power. Seraphel was meant to replace god the father’s doppelganger as warden of humanity after Metatron executed the false god for treason.

The archangel Seraphel was given the gift of omniscience but with the option to turn it on and off at will. The reason for that option is that without at least a three hour cool down after every hour of use, omniscience will drive anyone crazy. Anecdotally, the being that some people have recognized as god was not born omniscient. He was given the gift by his father(Primanthos) after being kicked out of the abyss for trying to overthrow the semblance of hierarchy that the primantheans had established.

At any rate, Seraphel served his purpose well for a time. But the creation of Metatron’s fifth son Rex marked the beginning of a most tempestuous phase of his relationship with his father. As there was not reason to think that creating sons who are identical to himself in all but hair and wing color could go horribly wrong, Metatron went on to create four more. In the order that they were born, the remaining sons of Metatron were named Alexander, Julius, Hector, Dante, and Atlas.

Their relationship went well for a time. They were granted powers and abilities that exceeded their grandfather’s by a wide margin. They were even gifted with artifacts that were imbued with Metatron’s battle instinct that he had honed by fighting against demonkind since the beginning of time. It is essentially a sixth sense that enabled them to anticipate their opponent’s moves without even having to look at them. But after a while, vanity set in.

Eventually they became vainly jealous of Metatron and became the most haughty group of archangels since Satan himself. At some point, Metatron decided that he should attempt to create daughters because of how wonderful his first daughter(Aranea) turned out to be. When they proved to be much more cooperative than his sons, Metatron enabled his daughters to slaughter them by giving them overwhelming spirit energy. At that point, Metatron had become resigned to the fact that his sons would always turn out to be jealous idiots who compelled others to kill them. It is one of several possible outcomes that become the result of celestial creation.

Just when all hope of having a son he could be proud of was gone, something special happened. One day Metatron’s appearance changed in such a way that every angel girl in the soul divorced their husbands and demanded to marry Metatron. As such an arrangement was untenable, he came up with a more practical solution. Metatron snapped his fingers and enabled all of the angel girls in heaven to create new husbands with his own energy. To that end, they all decided to create “clones” of Metatron who ended up being the first generation of archangels who were born of a mother. What’s more, the fact that they had both a mother and a father actually negated the effects of whatever vanity existed in their angelic hearts.

At this point you might be wondering what the recently divorced, nine foot tall angel husbands of the soul society were going to do now that all of the angel girls were married off to twelve foot tall prime specimens of angelic beauty and power. Metatron decided to double all of their individual power levels and then enabled them to create new wives with their own energy because being made of Metatron’s energy would confuse the newly created angel girls.

Now instead of having the memory ten failures, Metatron had trillions of sons who had the utmost respect and admiration for him. Among them was an archangel named Agamemnon who was truly his father’s kindred spirit. His desire and ability to emulate Metatron was so great that he emerged as his generation’s most exceptional archangel just like his father did before him according to the popular consensus of the soul society(angel heaven).

Agamemnon was so exceptional that he manged to convince Metatron’s first ten sons that their suicidal philosophy was wrong (after they were revived). When they realized the error of their ways, Ajax and his nine brothers apologized and reconciled with their father. In time, Agamemnon will rise in skill and power according to the power scale that was set in place by his father. But for now, it’s best to leave well enough alone. Unlike his father, Agamemnon was born in a time of peace. There is simply no need to raise his power level if there is a chance that it might alter his overall constitution for the worst. In the end, trying to do good for others turned out to be the reason for Metatron’s happiness. All there is to do now is look towards the future and see what wonders an eternity in the soul society will manifest.