Heavenly Current Events

by Joel Fernandez

When reading the bible, it is very easy to subconsciously assume that the spirit world is the same now as when the bible was written. In many respects, it stays the same because no one has to try to survive. Nobody in heaven has to work, eat or sleep in in order to make their wildest dreams come true. But the bible only tells us about the heaven that human beings reside in. It is where they go to, in essence, retire and do whatever they want. Today’s conversation will be about the difference between human heaven and angel heaven, and why the time has come for an autonomous realm of angels.

All things in the universe started with Jehovah. He created the heavens and the earth as well as humans and angels. He created angels before humans and animals. So comparing angles to birds connotes a perspective that is misinformed. The average height of an angel is 9 feet. The only exception to that rule are the identical triplets known as Metatron, Rahab and Sandalphon who are 12 feet tall like the creator. Aranea, the first female archangel, is also 12 feet tall; but we will explain her story later on in the essay.

Because they are two altogether different races that speak impossibly different languages, humans and angels are sorted into different heavenly realms. One is reserved for humans while the other six are inhabited by angels and Jehovah. It just so happens that Jehovah decided to grant Metatron divine omnipotence as well as the power of creation. Metatron chose to reject the gift of omniscience because he felt that it would alienate all of the angels in his life. Also, omniscience would be like having too much information all of the time. At any rate, allowing an archangel to ascend to godhood has universal implications that must be understood.

For the first time since the true beginning of creation, angels have the chance to be the masters of their own destiny. At this point, the simple-minded may confuse an autonomous realm of angels with a hell full of demons. But that would be, at best, a gross oversimplification. At worst, it would be a vile slander that demonic puppets would attempt to perpetuate. Jehovah foresaw all of these events and decided to deify Metatron anyway. There will be no rebellion in heaven or anything like that.

The truth is that Metatron and Jehovah are very similar in many ways but are polar opposites when it comes to the minor details. For example, Jehovah has created trillions of angels and 7 planets that are populated by humans and animals. Metatron only created three archangels and has no intention of creating more. Moreover, Metatron is simply not interested in creating a pet species the way that his father did. Whether humanity wants to acknowledge it or not, Jehovah essentially has to baby sit the human planets. He manipulates events on a global scale and sorts his pet humans into either the heaven or hell pile.

As a result of Metatron’s experience among his father’s pet humans, he has absolutely no interest in keeping tabs on an entire race of uninformed beings that inhabit the physical universe. As for his three archangel creations; their names are Ajax, Azrael, and Aranea. Ajax is essentially a carbon copy of Metatron. But his life experiences will make him his own person with his own unique inclinations. Azrael is actually a clone of Metatron’s twin brother Sandalphon except for a few major differences. Azrael is completely honest and is not selfish, which actually makes him Sandalphon’s polar opposite just like Metatron. Both of them are also 12 feet tall. Aranea is basically the female version of Metatron as well as the first female archangel in heaven’s history.

The three of them were almost immediately gifted with invulnerability as well as their own special artifacts that are similar to Metatron’s cube. The aforementioned cube is a celestial artifact that is imbued with Jehovah’s wisdom. It was meant to keep Metatron from making bad decisions. Since Jehovah’s wisdom was not Metatron’s to give, he gave his three creations pyramids that are imbued with all of the battle experience, instincts, and intuition that he has accumulated over the eons of celestial warfare against the forces of hell. He also gave Ajax and Azrael the ability to slow down time within a 20 yard omni-directional radius, which has the same effect as super speed in battle. Aranea was given the same power except that her radius is 30 yards. Additionally, her body is momentarily covered in Metatron’s invincible aura while striking, which gives her the power of one-hit kills.

The reason that they were given the power to slow down time instead of outright super speed is because Jehovah made Metatron the only being in existence that is faster than him. He later gave the same power to Metatron’s angel wolf, Ace. Speaking of angel wolves, they are very special among angel dogs because they transformed into their current wolf appearance after being blessed with the canine version of omnipotence.

Angel dogs are designed to look like short and stocky wolves. But there self-esteem causes them to transform. We already mentioned Ace, but Metatron has another angel wolf named Ghost. While Ace is jet black and possesses super speed, Ghost is snow white and has the power to make an infinite amount of clones of himself that disappear as soon as the current battle is over. Anecdotally, ghost used to be Sandalphon’s brown angel dog named Bruno. He decided to abandon his original master because Sandalphon is probably the most selfish entity in existence.

After test driving the power of creation, Metatron and his closest friends and family decided that it is time for an autonomous realm of angels. Having learned from heaven’s history and thus becoming determined not to repeat it, Metatron will create a new heaven that automatically destroys demons that teleport in. The realm will also eject invading angels or anyone who attempts to use lethal force. In a previous essay, we established that the heavenly realms are actually planets in the spirit world. In comic book terms, heaven exists inside of a pocket dimension that is surrounded by nothingness instead of being surrounded by outer space. Everyone in the realm will still respect Jehovah, but Metatron will rule as Archon of the realm that is tentatively being called “Ambrosia”.

What makes this realm different from the six other angel heavens is that angels will actually get to retire. When humans go to heaven, they don’t have to do anything to earn their keep. They have the right to live out their wildest dreams without having to worry about surviving. In the current angel heavens, all angels have an eternal job. Warrior, messenger, choirmaster, power, principality, scribe and so on and so forth. But in the new angel heaven, the angels will be able to do whatever they want. Metatron and his generals will continue to fight demonkind simply because they think it’s fun. After the creation of the new heaven, Jehovah will send all of the angels from heaven’s 2 through 7 to Metatron’s realm. Then he will create an entirely new generation of angels to take their place. Nobody but Jehovah knows the future, but we can all be sure that the celestial scene will be the heavenly version of must-see TV.

Archangel Consolidated